It is not often that I have to say goodbye to a best friend, but alas, I must now do so. Goodbye, adios, ciao, salut, sayonoro, it hurts in any language. My good friend came into my world ten years ago and pretty much had everything wrong with her background that would draw me into an immediate friendship; that is, she is a Yankee, she is a liberal, she is an alpha female and she is a nun, a Sister in the Faithful Companions of Jesus. In fact the only thing she has going for her is her willingness to be a Crimson Tide fan as well as my designated driver. I soon discovered she is compassionate to a fault, always finding a hidden pearl of the divine in every situation.
We started teaching Theology at a parochial school on the same day, not realizing that we would be friends, but to the shock of both of us, we did. We discovered that we like a world of the same things – movies, food, books, music, Disney – and I shared my Southern mind with her Northern mind and we carelessly erased the Mason-Dixon Line.
Over the next ten years we often had dinner together, went to movies and Broadway Musicals, toured Disney World, and shared our thoughts and feelings about the world, our families, our work, and our spiritual lives. We became unbreakable as “Sistas”: I taught her how to be fixing to go, that you can be either here or over yonder, that Birmingham is up and Mobile is down, and not everything is black and white – there is a lot of gray in the world. She taught me how to cuss like a Marine, how to look at others with love, to hand jester a sign for bullshit, and when to be quiet. We taught each other that men are rarely right, not to talk about politics in each other’s presence, and family trumps everything. Together we are strong as an oak tree, weak as a tender flower bud, and always flexible to the will of God.
My heart breaks that she is moving on to a new opportunity in London, England. But I see the excitement in her eyes, I can hear the anticipation of new experiences in her voice, and I know she is doing what is best for herself and her spiritual community.
I have never been one to re-invent the wheel; my style is to reuse, recycle and plagiarize with every ounce of dignity known to mankind (or perhaps I should say Sisterhood.) So with the traditions and words of Socrates, Tolstoy, Dickens, Milne, and Wicked, the Musical, I am sending this message to my Best friend via the West Wind:
My prayers go with you always:
“Our prayers should be for blessings in general, for God knows best what is good for us.” Socrates
As my friend you are a beacon of hope:
“Just as one candle lights another and can light thousands of other candles, so one heart can illuminate thousands of other hearts.”
Leo Tolstoy
I will remember you always:
“I wonder what Piglet is doing,” thought Pooh. “I wish I were there to be doing it too.”
A.A. Milne
Always carry Tuscaloosa with you as your home:
“Every traveler has a home of his own. And he learns to appreciate it the more from his wandering.”
Charles Dickens
I have been fortunate to be able to call you my friend and I know that I am a better person having known you:
I’ve heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don’t know if I believe that’s true
But I know I’m who I am today
Because I knew you…
Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
Because I knew you
I have been changed for good
— Glenda
It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You’ll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend…
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good
— Elphaba
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